Do you feel it? The constant pressure to change? Are you exploring it? Surrendering to it? Fighting it? Ignoring it? Does it exhilarate you or scare you – well, to Death?
In the image above, The Goddess Nut, our Great Cosmic Mother, is the shining portal of life through which we each pass. She holds back the unlimited expanse of the field of stars. We are each of us a star in her belly, each a part of the grand cosmos, each in a constant state of coming forth. She gives birth to us, even as she births the Sun God – Ra – shown by the position of the sun disks throughout her body.
From this portal, Death steps out of the black void of unlimited, yet unknown, possibilities into the defined frame of the world. Simultaneously, the Phoenix is moving up to meet Death. The shape of the dance with Nut, Death, and the Phoenix is the vesica piscus – “a type of lens, a mathematical shape formed by the intersection of two disks with the same radius, intersecting in such a way that the center of each disk lies on the perimeter of the other.” In other words – a portal. The butterfly in the card seems to be flying back into the void as if taking the memory of the most recent transformation back into the great Akashic Field to be recorded in our own Akashic Records. The whole images gives me a sense of Time – of slowing down the all encompassing into a fragment that can be experienced as Life.
The frame of our world changes constantly. Staying the same, or being in continual stasis, is not possible. Everything is shifting, morphing, transforming. Time does not stand still. The cycle of birth to death and birth again is the only constant; we see it happening all around us every day at every moment.
So why does change frighten us? If it is normal to die and be reborn, to transform and transcend, why fight it? Perhaps because we are mortal beings in body there is a strong sense of resistance by the body to change. The body wants to be stable, dependable and reliable. The body recruits the mind for support in this and constantly monitors all systems of the physical and makes every attempt to stabilize. We experience pain because the body says, after trying in many other ways to get our attention, “Look here! Trouble! Please fix!” Yet, our resistance is strong; we oppose new routines or ideas and prefer to stay comfortable in our known state of mind and body, even if it is painful. “I will start going to the exercise class tomorrow; I will change my diet tomorrow; someday I will get in the habit of daily spiritual exercises.” With those attitudes, Death has little option to assist us.
Culturally, the idea of Death says time is up – game over. Finished and Done, and that frightens us. The Phoenix says we are born again from the ashes ever rising up to live again, and again, and that challenges us. But even in that body-mind connection of stability and stasis there is constant change. Cells die and are replaced. We breathe in and out, recycling air through our entire body. Even stubborn muscle memory can be changed.
So it is not surprising that we experience conflict between that very strong power of needing stability and the unlimited, ever changing nature of our Eternal Being. How is our Eternal Being supposed to get through this tough, stubborn 3-D trauma to communicate with us? If we were consciously aware of all the body is doing we could not function. If we were aware of all our Spirit/Soul/Eternal Being is doing, we might not be able to stay in the body at all. We are transitional all the time. All aspects of us. That portal Nut holds for us opens and closes. Death is simply the Doorman.