The sometimes treacherous journey from childbirth to birthing ourselves.
Somewhere between the ages of 35 and 45, (and which continues until our death) we begin the process of the midlife journey – a process through which we move beyond childbearing to birthing ourselves. For many, the advent of this transition comes in the form of a rude awakening, personal crisis or tragedy and continues through volatile physical and emotional changes which seem at once to be disconcerting and confusing.
The purpose of the midlife journey is to knock us out of the comfort of status quo and into the passion, meaning and purpose that will define their lives beyond motherhood. Like childbirth, the midlife journey can be dangerous and fraught with pain, but like the birth of a child, can produce a gift beyond measure and miraculous to behold.
Common signs that you might be in the midst of the midlife transition:
- Impatience, anger, rage
- Panic attacks
- Physical and emotional changes
The purpose and goal of the midlife transition is to clear out all the inner and outer obstacles and make way for the birth of our Soul – the uniquely creative way in which we have been gifted to find meaning and purpose in our life and to contribute to the betterment of the world.
Confronting what we swept under the rug
In order to accomplish the midlife task of birthing our Soul, we have to confront everything that we have spent the past 30-50 some years sweeping under the rug. We have to confront EVERY unhealed wound. For some, this might mean acknowledging that wounding actually took place. Until we are ready to confront hurt, betrayal, disappointment, loss and even abuse, we sometimes have to ignore (suppress or repress) that is even took place. As we approach midlife, our Soul conspires to free us from these hurts and begins to kick the rug under which these things have been swept. When the debris of our past is unleashed upon us, it can, at first, feel traumatic, but the intention is not to harm us or make us crazy, it is to help us heal and release the things of the past so that our true self can emerge. When the debris is freed, we have a choice, we can seek support and assistance with confronting these issues, or we can try, once again, to sweep them under the rug. The courageous seek support and find healing. The fearful simply create more stress and anxiety for themselves through all the effort it takes to keep their truth under the rug.
Our current life always contains reflections of the Soul, but in midlife, the Soul wants more. As the Soul begins to emerge, it shakes up the perceived security of our lives and challenges the status quo. In order to allow our Soul its fullest expression, we may have to change the structure of our lives and be ready to let go of what is no longer supportive of the Soul to welcome a life that we do not yet know. This is scary. But again, the courageous meet this invitation head on and work through all the inner fears and resistance to change, thereby allowing the birth of the Soul. Others, run the other way. At the end of the day, if we really want to embrace a life that is fulfilling, content, loving, peaceful and joyful and on which has meaning and purpose and helps to contribute to the betterment of the world, we have to put on our big girl panties and embrace the Courage that God/dess gave us to succeed in this task. And if we think we do not have courage – this is where we are VERY wrong. Courage is an inner quality that we all possess. We decide if we want to use it or not.
For support in navigating the Midlife Journey, check out Lauri Ann Lumby’s new course: Surviving Midlife.